Welcome

Welcome to my blog. This is a journal of things in my life during the adoption process. If you want to start at the beginning you need to read backwards. What this means is go to the archives (January 2006) and read through to current time. I enjoy reading your comments, so please post your thoughts for me to read. Colette

Monday, August 14, 2006

Things to know about China and the adoption process.

Size

China is made up of 1.2 billion people, the largest population in the world, one fifth of the total. Every year the country adds another 12 million. However china has only 7% of the worlds arable land and fresh water, 3% of the forests, and only 2% of the oil. And although China's landmass is roughly the same size as the United States, it has 4.5 times the population. In addition, China's enormous population is unevenly distributed with 94% living in the southeastern part of the country. (In the U.S. this distribution would translate to nearly 1 billion people living east of the Mississippi River).

What is the One Child Policy

In 1979, China implemented a "one child policy" in an effort to control population growth. Under this program, a sophisticated system rewarded those who observed the policy and penalized those who did not. Couples with only one child were given a "one child certificate" entitling them to such benefits as cash bonuses, longer maternity leave, better childcare, and preferential housing assignments. In return they were required to pledge they would not have more children. The penalties for having more than one child are severe if discovered and can consist of being fined a years wages, the loss of their job, imprisonment and social ostracism. Forced abortion and sterilization have been a common practice to eliminate unwanted pregnancies or a baby girl.

Why so many Girls?

We have been told that 95% of babies adopted from China are girls. Why are there so many little girls? China is primarly an agricultural country. These people work and they work hard, for little pay. Therefore there is a need for men and boys. Cultural practice also plays in on this. Sons stay home and take care of aging parents and carry on the family name and farm. As a chinese girl grows up and marries, she leaves to move in with her husband and his family.

What do they do with their babies?

For most of China, it is illegal to give birth to a second child. It is also illegal to abandon a child. I have wondered if these mothers are hoping for 9 months that this will be a boy, or that by some miracle the law will change and they will be able to keep their child regardless. When the baby is born they are forced to abandon their child anonymously. Birthmothers normally leave their baby girls in a place they know she will be found and taken care of, like a busy public market, or on the steps of the orphanage. Sometimes maybe a note will be left with her birthdate. Most of the time there is nothing of her past. She will be taken into the orphanage, they will determine how old they think she might be and they will name her.

Health of Children

From everything we have read, most of the chinese babies are very healthy. Since most of the mothers live on rural farms, they are not exposed to drugs and alcohol. Most of the children are raised in an orphange although there are a small percent in foster homes. We do expect that our baby might be developmentally behind from lack of stimulation, but have no doubt that she will catch up quickly once she is surrounded in love with one on one attention.

Meeting our Baby

Once we receive our referral, we will give our acceptance and then we will travel to China about 8 weeks later. We will be gone for about 2 weeks. There is a chance of 3 weeks if we get one particular orphange. We will first fly to Beijing for some sightseeing. About 2 or 3 days later we will travel to meet our baby near her orphanage. We will finish some paperwork there and then fly to Guangzhou which is where the US Consulate is. More paperwork, medical exams, application for her visa, passport etc... We understand when we first meet our daughter that it may not go as smoothly as we hope. She is going to be with strange people, who look different and sound different than what she is use to. When we return home, we realize that there is going to be big adjustments for our baby. We have read that many of the babies might have problems with bonding, and we are prepared to deal with whatever comes our way. One complaint I hear often from adoptive parents is that people often ask, in front of their children, "what did their real mom look like?" People need to realize that we are her real family and will always be. Our belief is that God planned for her to be our daughter all along, he just wanted her to come from someone else's stomach. To us she is already a part of our family, our daughter.

1 comment:

~Crazy 4 Daizies~ said...

What a beautiful attitude. I too agree that our destinies are planned out for us....we just have to accept graciously what we are given and hope for the best.

Life is all about Faith....in every facet.

This was very informative to read. I didn't know all the details of this, but have heard about the one child laws and the excess number of little girls.

Thanks for sharing this.